Steps To Build Self Esteem

By Tyrone P. Rollins


Though it is difficult to give a definition of self esteem, the psychological term denotes an individual's evaluation about their own self. Though many give their own definition of self esteem, widely accepted definition is that of Nathaniel Branden. According to him, self esteem is "the experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and being worthy of happiness".It is important to understand, when born, most of us will have high self esteem. This is influenced as we grow, by teachers, parents and other friends or relatives. Many have low self esteem due to one of these influencing personalities. With low esteem, we can never live life to their fullest, or enjoy life. Even doing our daily routine, relationships, or achieving goals can become a problem with reduced self esteem.

You will easily be able to identify a person with high self esteem. Their very existence will exude all the characteristics above, from their physical appearance right down to the manner in which they speak. They tend to be popular, motivated, ambitious and do not accept defeat easily. Their purpose in life has meaning and they vigorously pursue what they want until they achieve it.In contract, people with low self esteem think they are worthless. They believe that nothing they do merits recognition, praise, respect or reward. Such a person will contently devalue themselves in the presence of others because they simply do not believe they are worthy. They tend to shy away from social inclusion and take the view that everybody else's opinions matter more than their own. They feel shameful and embarrassed at the very thought that they could ever be admirable in any way.

The major downside of low self esteem is the fact that it holds us back. A sound self esteem is very important for it allows us to succeed in life. It makes our life better and gives us the power to enjoy life more. Building self esteem and confidence is therefore considered as one of the challenges of life that we need to cope with. This way we will reap the rewards of having a productive and fulfilling life in general.So, if building self esteem and confidence is one of you concerns, there are several ways on how you can be able to do this without difficulty. These ways include the following:Try to become skilled at the things that the majority of people cannot do. It does not mean that you need t be a superhero with super powers to accomplish a certain undertaking that are usually avoided by people.

Stay motivated at all times. Reading inspirational thoughts, affirmations, quotes on self esteem and everything related, can keep you upbeat and motivated.Socialize and never restrict yourself to a cage! You need to mingle with others, get out of your room or home and talk to people you know and know those you don't! Socializing, is one way to improve your self esteem.Set realistic goals and strive to achieve them. By setting goals and working towards achieving them, you improve your self esteem.

If you are having these very struggles in your life then continue reading this article on self esteem tips. Then start to apply the knowledge in your everyday life and you will start to see a positive change for the better. Self esteem is how we view our own selves and our abilities to perform certain tasks. If we perceive that we can not do the very tasks that are expected in our daily lives. Then our mental perception of our life is that we will not succeed in life. This is the worst state of mind because it literally decides our outcome before we even try.The reason why so many people have this mind set is because of the way they were raised. They were never told they were a good person and they are usually put down and made to feel as though they will never amount to anything in life.Because of this we have very low self esteem and we must do our best to reverse all of this negative mind set. You can do this by using simple techniques to build good self esteem.You want to start telling yourself that you are a good person. That you believe in yourself and your abilities. You may not have all the answers to overcome your challenges, but have confidence in the fact that you can and are willing to do what it takes to find the answers and go on to overcome your challenges.

This kind of problem can erode the foundations of your relationship until there is not much left. This might take years to happen and then the spouse will just blow up. Obviously this can have catastrophic results on the relationship.You cannot force any to have more self-esteem because it has to come from within themselves. Saying that, it is possible to encourage them to work on self-esteem issues, even though you should not expect overnight results.Here are some tips for building self-esteem in your loved one:Offer them unconditional love. Whatever they do or don't do, show your love for them. If their behavior is upsetting you, discuss this with them but do it together. Everyone makes mistakes. If they make a mistake, show that you still love them regardless.

Your Husband's Affair Was Not Your Fault And The Mistress Or Other Woman Doesn't Have Anything That You Don't Have: Although I'm sure at one point you may hear your husband say that the affair happened because he felt there was something in the marriage he wasn't getting, the truth is there are millions of men who have frustrations and who don't cheat on their wives. Husbands who cheat, for whatever reason, have had poor impulse control and decision making and the blame for this is entirely on their own shoulders. With that said, it may help to know that well over 75% of husband's who cheat say that they did so for emotional and not physical reasons. It's so common to believe that an affair is all about sex, but most times it really isn't. It's about the husband feeling bad about himself and his own self worth and trying to recapture something he feels has been lost outside of his marriage. And, you should know that only 12% of men who have cheated felt the other woman was prettier than their wives. Almost 80% of men who cheat are "extremely sorry" that the affair happened.

You have to lay down very clear goals for yourself. This is something that you should do on an everyday basis because it will certainly assist you deal with different people in a much simpler way. It is vital for you to understand that if you have great relations with others, then attaining your goals will be much simpler. You need to be more outgoing in your mission. This suggests that you must be the one to take the initiative. Many individuals react positively to those who take proactive functions in life.Value each and every individual that you satisfy. If you do this, then many individuals will feel great being around you and they will certainly additionally often tend to reciprocate the treatment.

Sometimes it is nice to do little things "just because", such as giving gifts, leaving notes and doing other special things for your partner. These things can (and should) be done outside special occasions too. Never be deprecating, in private or in public. Don't put your spouse down or make generalized comments like "you never take out the trash" or "you always leave a mess in the kitchen". These comments will make your spouse feel they do everything wrong. And saying bad things about them in public is never acceptable and will just embarrass them and knock them down emotionally.

Understand that you are a very desirable woman no matter what has happened in recent days. Whether you still want your husband or you end up with someone else, one day you will have to restore trust and intimacy with a man again. The affair may make this difficult, but here is the catch 22. In order to feel truly intimate with a man, you must trust him. You can't do this if deep down you have doubts about his true feelings and loyalty. The best way to banish these doubts is to, when you are ready, dive in first with one toe and eventually with your whole open heart.Yes, this will make you feel vulnerable at first, but here's the truth. Your self esteem will be restored when you experience deep and lasting intimacy that can not be faked or manufactured. It helped me to educate myself on intimacy and sexuality. I learned several things that I wasn't doing in my marriage that ignited serious and very genuine sparks and fireworks when I did. I no longer worry that my husband will cheat again. He's very happy at home. It may be a while before you are ready for this, but be patient. You will know it when you feel it and when you do, I doubt very much you'll be thinking about your self esteem at that time.




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